It’s Poetry Tuesday! We are going to go back through all my old notebooks and look at the god-awful poetry I wrote when I was an angsty teen and then you will get present day Michelle’s re-interpretation/headdesk horror-filled embarrassment. Trigger warning for teenage glorifying of suicide. If you are feeling suicidal please go here Flying…
Tag: original female character
Object of Focus
Anne checked her watched and stifled a growl of frustration. She paced around the kitchen one more time before making her decision and walking up to the bathroom door and hammering on it with one fist. “Come on, Farley!” she hollered through the door. “You have been in there twenty minutes already.” “Bathroom time is…
Relationship Talk
“I think we need to break up,” Farley said. “Why?” Matt looked stunned. “I thought everything was going great.” “You know what I look like when I come.” “You know what I look like when I come?” Matt relaxed a fraction, confusion mixing with amusement as he realized this was not a real breakup conversation….
Wax on, Wax Off
Farley was a low-maintenance kind of girl and she liked that about herself. It didn’t take her three hours to get out of the apartment in the morning and she didn’t spend half of her paycheck on beauty supplies. Makeup was typically a once a week occurrence reserved for the days when the stars aligned…
Desperate Serial Killer Seeking Significant Other
Time Stamp: Pre-Matt Short, cute, slightly crazy woman seeking partner. Do you enjoy being simultaneously terrified and aroused out of your mind? Does awkwardness turn you on? Have you ever wanted to date a girl who is more obsessed with your penis than you are? Then we have got the person for you! Her name…
Text Message Panic
Farley had never dated someone who was emotionally in touch and affectionate. She didn’t really understand how to react to cute text messages and spontaneous hugs and kisses that weren’t necessarily a prelude to sex. So the first time Matt sent her a text that read had to deal with so many idiots today. made…
Nonverbal Before Coffee
Anne and her friend Wren were sitting at the kitchen table talking easily over their second cups of coffee when Farley shuffled into the room and headed straight for the small, manual espresso machine on top of the microwave. Wren opened her mouth to greet her, but Anne shook her head. “Far is nonverbal before…
Serial Killer: Farley
Anne exhaled and dropped the draft she was reading on the table. “Ooooookaaaaay, Farley,” she said. “You sound like a serial killer.” “How!? How do I sound like a serial killer?” Farley demanded. Anne picked the paper back up and cleared her throat. “‘I find most of my artistic inspiration in the human body,’” Anne…
Those Five Words
“Farley, we need to talk,” Anne said. Farley looked up from where she was halfway through her assigned Biology reading. All of her warning bells were going off. Klaxons screaming, lights flashing. Those five words never ended well for her, ever. Be cool. Be cool. She reminded herself silently. “Yeah?” Farley asked, and her voice…
Seventies Porn Style
“Please remove your clothes, then lay down on the table and cover yourself with the sheet,” the nurse instructed before slipping out the door. Farley slide out of her jeans and panties in one swoop and folded them up, placing them on the chair. She pulled her t-shirt off, folded it and set it on top…
One Time!
Farley wandered into her roommate’s bedroom and face-planted in her bed, whining loudly. Anne ignored her until Farley started poking her nonstop. “What is it, Farley?” Ann asked as she bookmarked her page. “My dick is three states away,” Farley whimpered, rolling her head to the side so Anne could hear her. “Your…dick?” Anne was…
Re-Evaluating Partner Choices
After her first gynecologist appointment, Farley’s annual vag checkup was old hat for her. She wasn’t even in the grin-and-bear-it-but-more-like-close-your-eyes-and-endure-it camp; she was firmly in the this-ain’t-no-big-deal-let’s-chat-while-you-put-shit-up-my-vag club. Since she only got to see her gynecologist once a year, her time to impress and traumatize was very short, and in five years she had yet…
Little Gentian 