Love and Doubt

Love and doubt. I listened to a podcast one day about doubt and religion. The guest and host spoke about how questioning and doubt used to be an important part of religion. Now days, questioning and doubt signal immediate loss of faith and is squashed unrelentingly. Braced over my lover, staring into his green eyes as…

Resting Inside Myself

What Would I Be if I Actually Rested in Me? I would be less anxious. I would breathe easier. My chest would be open as if my ribs had unhooked to free my lungs to accept as much of the world into them as they wanted. I would have less random aches and pains flaring…

Brick

Being around her was not unlike taking a brick to the face three times a day and still smiling and saying, yes, please, may I have another? You would think that after six months it would ease up, but she always managed to find another way to grind my face into the pavement, metaphorically speaking….

Hey Brain

Hey Brain, WAKE UP! You have been lethargic and wishy-washy for two weeks now. It is time for us to buck up and get back to work! Stress and the changing seasons only get you so far! We have a Spring and Summer to conquer and we can only do it if you are on…

Baby Michelle was Melodramatic

It’s Poetry Tuesday! We are going to go back through all my old notebooks and look at the god-awful poetry I wrote when I was an angsty teen and then you will get present day Michelle’s re-interpretation/headdesk horror-filled embarrassment. Depression  (Unfinished) Someone save me from this hell Bring light to me in this dark cell…

Subway Musings

Who would you be if you weren’t angry? I responded that I didn’t know and as the days pass by that ideal individual appears elusive. I find that everything makes me rage internally and want to slam people’s heads into walls. Inconsiderate people on the train who never take their backpacks off so that it…

No More X-Files

He holds his magazine open with the pages tucked between his index and middle finger. His index and thumb form a circle and my brain can’t help but spin out and create stories about secret spy signals and how this could be one. Someone roughly whispered in his ear that if he needed help he…

Horror Movie

His sneakers are all black and look to be almost new. His jeans are not. They are starting to fray at the cuffs, two holes worn through at the knees, one on the inside of his left knee the other almost on top of his right knee. Through the holes I can see his grey…

Black Leather Converse

He is wearing what look like black, leather converse sneakers with no socks. He could be wearing anklet socks, but my inclination is to believe the worst of people this early in the morning. He looks like he is too big for the seat, not because he is too wide, but too tall. With his…

Partially Laced Boots

He is wearing fawn-colored, thick-soled, construction boots that look brand new and completely unbroken. They are not laced all the way up, instead he has laced them up five rows and tied them off, just until the bottom of his ankle, like when you wear sneakers. Between his feet is a black duffel bag. His…

Baby Michelle Was Melodramatic

Trigger Warning for cutting and suicide. Fives Secrets lurk behind my eyes But you can’t see past my lies You’re my best friend But you can’t see when I pretend You think I love big shirts It’s really to hide all my hurts From both my mother and I You don’t know I cut when…