I don’t know if I mentioned this in the first post, but the 30 Reasons Not to Date a Superhero(ine) are meant to be reasons why NON-SUPERS shouldn’t date supers, if that wasn’t obvious. This is a humor piece and not meant to offend or discriminate against superhero(in)es. Superhero(in)es deserve love, too. [In no particular…
Tag: life struggles
Tit Talk #1
Some men name their penises and talk about them in the third person, so Farley refuses to let anyone make her feel weird about the fact that she calls her breasts “the girls” and that the three of them have pep talks. She started calling her breasts “the girls” in high school, but they didn’t…
#30 – Ooooops! My Bad!
In the aftermath of Captain America Day, I figured it might be a good idea to grace all of you with the top 30 reasons for why it is inadvisable to date superhero(in)es. I am not saying that you should NEVER date supers, I am just saying, here are a few things to think about…
Farley’s First Appointment
The first time Farley went to the gynecologist, she was nowhere near as blasé. She picked at the appointment like a half-healed scab, and ran to her mother every time it hurt. Her mother, to her credit, did her best to assuage her daughter’s worries and fears, but a mother’s assurances can only do so…
Hey God, are you there? It’s me, Michelle
Hey God, I know you’ll never give me more than I can handle, but you could please stop fucking trusting me so much? I need a fucking break. All the love and respect, Overwrought Raised Catholic
Dear Sexist Asshole
Dear Sexist Assholes: Enough is ENOUGH! I have had it with your motherfucking opinions all up in my motherfucking vag. Everybody strap in! (gets up on stage) I’m about to open some fuckin’ minds. Always my own, A woman on the edge
Dear Bitchy Prudes
Dear Bitchy Prudes, It’s none of your damn business if my breasts “pop” out of my dress. I do not appreciate your concern and I do not need it. I know my limits and I very rarely exceed them. If my boobs do happen to “pop” out – too fucking bad. It’s not like…
The C [in NYC] Stands for Cynic
I have been told many times that romance novels give women unrealistic expectations for sex, for relationships, for life in general, etc., and I can agree with that on some level. It’s not that I ever thought that sex was going to be how it is in romance novels. I understand the myth/fantasy/rarity of the…
Classified
I found this in one of my notebooks and it gave me a laugh: Second year creative writing MFA student seeking: male, orphan, massage therapist who plays hockey. Must be no older than thirty-two. Would prefer some post-high school education (Bachelor’s degree or better). Submissives need not apply. Must appreciate quirky sense of humor and…
A New Lease on Life
Hey Ya’ll, I know I disappeared for a bit and I am sorry. I was having a really hard time at my job. My stress levels were through the roof and I had no mental space to take care of myself. But I am back. I got a new job and I am at the…
Playlist 9 – Impressions, D18
Playlist: Depressed Song 18: When You’re Gone by Avril Lavigne Fingerprints Touch starved. Fingertips skating over cheekbones, a warm hand on the back of my neck, the heavy grounding weight of a hand on my head or shoulder. Lean on me, push me into the ground, root me down and stop me from flying away. Bracelet…
Impenetrable
I am impenetrable. I am impenetrable because I will it to be so. I have the last say and I will not let you dig under my skin and I will not let you manipulate me and I will not allow you to have any power or sway over me. I have the agency in…
Little Gentian 