Object of Focus

Anne checked her watched and stifled a growl of frustration. She paced around the kitchen one more time before making her decision and walking up to the bathroom door and hammering on it with one fist. “Come on, Farley!” she hollered through the door. “You have been in there twenty minutes already.” “Bathroom time is…

Relationship Talk

“I think we need to break up,” Farley said. “Why?” Matt looked stunned. “I thought everything was going great.” “You know what I look like when I come.” “You know what I look like when I come?” Matt relaxed a fraction, confusion mixing with amusement as he realized this was not a real breakup conversation….

Desperate Serial Killer Seeking Significant Other

Time Stamp: Pre-Matt Short, cute, slightly crazy woman seeking partner. Do you enjoy being simultaneously terrified and aroused out of your mind? Does awkwardness turn you on? Have you ever wanted to date a girl who is more obsessed with your penis than you are? Then we have got the person for you! Her name…

Text Message Panic

Farley had never dated someone who was emotionally in touch and affectionate. She didn’t really understand how to react to cute text messages and spontaneous hugs and kisses that weren’t necessarily a prelude to sex. So the first time Matt sent her a text that read had to deal with so many idiots today. made…

Don’t Believe Everything You Read

Anne came through the door to the apartment, calling out a distracted greeting as she shed her purse and kicked off her shoes. She shrugged out of her jacket and tossed it on the shoe rack as she made her way to the fridge to grab her juice. Opening the fridge she vaguely noted that…

Serial Killer: Farley

Anne exhaled and dropped the draft she was reading on the table. “Ooooookaaaaay, Farley,” she said. “You sound like a serial killer.” “How!? How do I sound like a serial killer?” Farley demanded. Anne picked the paper back up and cleared her throat. “‘I find most of my artistic inspiration in the human body,’” Anne…

Library Etiquette

The Original Prompt was: I guess this could be more a request than anything else but I’m not 100% sure what to classify it as. Anyways, as you know, I find Farley hysterical and obviously want to read more of her. A lot of her stories are based on her gynecologist appointments, but her last…