The Week of 4/16/2006

Witty one liner: My parents almost lost me as a child, but they didn’t take me far enough into the woods.

Quote of the week: “Never squat with your spurs on.” – Anonymous

Offbeat oddity (courtesy of the planner): A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.

My parents never almost lost me to the woods, but I did manage to wander off on my poor mother in a grocery store and then couldn’t remember the color of her coat. So the poor store attendee is walking me around looking for a woman in one color coat while I am just looking for my mom and I spot her and then book off and the attendee is like NO WRONG PERSON! And I am all MOMMEH I FOUND YOUUUUUUU….whoops, wrong coat : D LOVE!!!!

Never squatting on your spurs just reminds me of all the movies I watched with my father: High Plains Drifter; The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly; and The Treasure of the Sierra Madre just to name a few. Which simply brings fond memories of snack dinners and being traumatized by films that were “good for you.”

And that last thing is the reason why COCKROACHES ARE FUCKING TERRIFYING and are going to inherit the earth. They fucking KEEP GOING after being beheaded. We don’t. God we are all going to be murdered by cockroaches in our sleep. Yup. This might be worse than X-Files. Apologies to The Boyfriend. I will not be leaving my apartment every again. Or even my bed for that matter. I am just going to curl up in the middle of my bed and weep quietly while I contemplate my impending murder by cockroaches. You are welcome. Thank my imagination.