The Week of 4/2/2006

Witty one liner: Silence is golden….but screaming is fun!

Quote of the week: [cut out]

Planner Quote: “What is now proved was once imagined” – William Blake

Offbeat oddity (courtesy of the planner): A fly flies slower when the sun is behind the clouds than when it’s sunny

Happy belated April Fool’s Day! I don’t really celebrate, but word of advice? It is the best day to announce that you have broken up with someone/change your FB status to single because everyone will think it’s a joke and then the next day when you don’t change it back and they realize it’s true, it’s too late to say anything. You’re welcome for the free, awkward advice.

I don’t really agree with the witty one liner. I am SUPER self-conscious about screaming or shouting in public. The Boyfriend is not, he will shout or yell things just to watch me freak out and shush him. He’ll inhale really deeply and I’ll cover his mouth as quick as I can and from behind my hand he starts mouthing and pantomiming “what? what? I’m not doing anything!” I usually give in first and then he yells it anyways. One time I wanted something from Spencers’s for Halloween and my mom was very nicely buying it for me, but when they told her she got 10% off the total price if she screamed she looked at me and said “scream.” It took a moment, but man did I scream. Speaking of screaming, I have a reoccurring theme in my nightmares – an inability to scream. I will be running or trapped and help is right there, all I have to do is scream to get their attention, but when I open my mouth to scream nothing comes out. I am so scared I lose my voice. Like that time I rode the Superman Ride of Steel at Six Flags. I was freaking out all the way to the top of the first hill and then when it went over the top I opened my mouth and screamed as loud as I could, but nothing came out.

Hmmm, Michelle nine years ago was a bitch cutting out all those quotes. So here is a new one for us: “There’s many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.” – Flannery O’Connor. I really like this quote because it makes me smile and think about Fifty Shades of Gray. Something that could have TOTALLY been prevented by a good teacher. It could have also been enhanced by FUCKING RESEARCH. But that is neither here nor there.

I like the planner’s quote because it is so true and it just makes you wonder what things we are imagining now that will soon be proven. I know all the Back to the Future fans are desperately waiting for their hoverboards and I would love to have Instant Transportation in order to avoid the subway some mornings, but it is always good to keep in mind what will be sacrificed for these things. As much as we hate commuting, and there are definitely many commutes that are unnecessarily long, they give us space from work and time to decompress and process. I have finally stopped zoning out on every commute and have begun to listen to podcasts and read. I ACTUALLY READ THREE BOOKS THIS PAST WEEK. I am freaking stunned. I will review them soon my dears.

As for flies flying slower when the sun is behind the clouds? Fuck flies. They are gross little corpse breeders whose progeny are maggots. Ugh. Flies.