I was Afraid to Tell You
I didn’t want to dominate you.
I couldn’t inhabit that world if you wanted it.
I wouldn’t be able to follow.
That the condom in your back pocket hurt me the most
and the thought of your hands on her made me sick.
I needed more.
I felt unsafe around you.
I had to protect myself, hide who I was.
I thought if you moved down here you would swallow me up
and dismantle my life.
You felt so far away.
I slept better without you here.
Your need for me was stifling.
I liked not having to wait for your calls.
I was afraid to tell you no.
To tell you to go.
I was afraid I was making a mistake
I was afraid I was doing what was right
And that you had been the mistake